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Shaw, George Bernard, 1856-1950

"Fanny's First Play"

Just before he let you in. A duke! Here has everything been
respectable from the beginning of the world, as you may say, to the
present day; and all of a sudden everything is turned upside down.
MRS KNOX. It's like in the book of Revelations. But I do say that
unless people have happiness within themselves, all the earthquakes,
all the floods, and all the prisons in the world cant make them really
happy.
KNOX. It isnt alone the curious things that are happening, but the
unnatural way people are taking them. Why, theres Margaret been in
prison, and she hasnt time to go to all the invitations shes had from
people that never asked her before.
GILBEY. I never knew we could live without being respectable.
MRS GILBEY. Oh, Rob, what a thing to say! Who says we're not
respectable?
GILBEY. Well, it's not what I call respectable to have your children
in and out of gaol.
KNOX. Oh come, Gilbey! we're not tramps because weve had, as it were,
an accident.
GILBEY. It's no use, Knox: look it in the face. Did I ever tell you
my father drank?
KNOX. No. But I knew it. Simmons told me.
GILBEY. Yes: he never could keep his mouth quiet: he told me your
aunt was a kleptomaniac.
MRS KNOX. It wasnt true, Mr Gilbey. She used to pick up
handkerchiefs if she saw them lying about; but you might trust her
with untold silver.
GILBEY. My Uncle Phil was a teetotaller. My father used to say to
me: Rob, he says, dont you ever have a weakness.


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