O!"
he proceeded, shaking his head sorrowfully, "you know not in what a
position of torture you place me. You said you believed me to be a
gentleman; so I trust--I feel--I am, and what is more, a brother, and
an affectionate brother, if I--O, my God, what am I to do? How, knowing
what I know of that unfortunate young man, could I ever have expected
this? In the meantime I thank you for your confidence, Miss Goodwin; I
hope it was God himself who inspired you to place it in me, and that
it may be the means of your salvation from--but perhaps I am saying
too much; he is my brother; excuse me, I am not just now cool and calm
enough to say what I would wish, and what you, poor child, neither know
nor suspect, and perhaps I shall never mention it; but you must give me
time. Of course, under the circumstances you have mentioned, I resign
all hopes of my own happiness with you; but, so help me Heaven, if I
shall resign all hopes of yours. I cannot now speak at further length;
I am too much surprised, too much agitated, too much shocked at what I
have heard; but I shall see you, if you will allow me, to-morrow; and as
I cannot become your husband, perhaps I may become your guardian angel.
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