For none of these things are of a permanent or lasting nature; not
to mention that no generous friendship ever sprang from them. There
remains, then, only one way of honourable attachment which custom allows in
the beloved, and this is the way of virtue; for as we admitted that any
service which the lover does to him is not to be accounted flattery or a
dishonour to himself, so the beloved has one way only of voluntary service
which is not dishonourable, and this is virtuous service.
For we have a custom, and according to our custom any one who does service
to another under the idea that he will be improved by him either in wisdom,
or in some other particular of virtue--such a voluntary service, I say, is
not to be regarded as a dishonour, and is not open to the charge of
flattery. And these two customs, one the love of youth, and the other the
practice of philosophy and virtue in general, ought to meet in one, and
then the beloved may honourably indulge the lover. For when the lover and
beloved come together, having each of them a law, and the lover thinks that
he is right in doing any service which he can to his gracious loving one;
and the other that he is right in showing any kindness which he can to him
who is making him wise and good; the one capable of communicating wisdom
and virtue, the other seeking to acquire them with a view to education and
wisdom, when the two laws of love are fulfilled and meet in one--then, and
then only, may the beloved yield with honour to the lover.
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