In
our own country a far better principle prevails, but, as I was saying, the
explanation of it is rather perplexing. For, observe that open loves are
held to be more honourable than secret ones, and that the love of the
noblest and highest, even if their persons are less beautiful than others,
is especially honourable. Consider, too, how great is the encouragement
which all the world gives to the lover; neither is he supposed to be doing
anything dishonourable; but if he succeeds he is praised, and if he fail he
is blamed. And in the pursuit of his love the custom of mankind allows him
to do many strange things, which philosophy would bitterly censure if they
were done from any motive of interest, or wish for office or power. He may
pray, and entreat, and supplicate, and swear, and lie on a mat at the door,
and endure a slavery worse than that of any slave--in any other case
friends and enemies would be equally ready to prevent him, but now there is
no friend who will be ashamed of him and admonish him, and no enemy will
charge him with meanness or flattery; the actions of a lover have a grace
which ennobles them; and custom has decided that they are highly
commendable and that there no loss of character in them; and, what is
strangest of all, he only may swear and forswear himself (so men say), and
the gods will forgive his transgression, for there is no such thing as a
lover's oath.
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