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Kettle, T. M. (Thomas Michael), 1880-1916

"The Open Secret of Ireland"

Of course you will understand
that, as Chancellor of the Exchequer, I am bound to see that due
economy is observed.
_Ko-Ko_. Oh, but you said just now, 'Don't stint yourself; do it
well.'
_Pooh-Bah_. As Private Secretary.
_Ko-Ko_. And now you say that due economy must be observed.
_Pooh-Bah_. As Chancellor of the Exchequer.
_Ko-Ko_. I see. Come over here where the Chancellor can't hear us.
_(They cross stage.)_ Now, as my Solicitor, how do you advise me to
deal with this difficulty?
_Pooh-Bah_. Oh, as your Solicitor, I should have no hesitation in
saying chance it.
_Ko-Ko_. Thank you _(shaking his head)_; I will.
_Pooh-Bah_. If it were not that, as Lord Chief Justice, I am bound
to see that the law isn't violated.
_Ko-Ko_. I see. Come over here where the Chief Justice can't hear
us. (_They cross the stage_.) Now, then, as First Lord of the
Treasury?
_Pooh-Bah_. Of course, as First Lord of the Treasury, I could
propose a special vote that would cover all expenses if it were not
that, as leader of the Opposition, it would be my duty to resist
it, tooth and nail.


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