" He brought his large hard hand down on the
table, so that the board rang and the lamp quaked; then he settled his
rounded shoulders stubbornly, and again unfurled the newspaper.
This strong declaration of wrath, and the reproaches concerning the
money, were a relief to Caius. A relief from what? Had he contemplated
for a moment taking his life in his hand and obeying the unexpected
appeal? Yet he felt no answering anger in return for the rebuke; he only
found himself comfortably admitting that if his father put it on the
score of expense he certainly had no right to give time or money that
did not belong to him. It was due to his parents that all his occupation
should henceforth be remunerative.
He put the letter away in his pocket, but, perhaps because he laid it
next his heart, the next day its cry awoke within him again, and would
not be silenced.
Christianity was identified in his mind with an exclusive way of life,
to him no longer good or true; but what of those stirring principles of
Socialism that were abroad in the world, flaunting themselves as
superior to Christianity? He was a child of the age, and dared not deny
its highest precepts. Who would go to these people if he did not go? As
to his father, he had coaxed him before for his own advantage; he could
coax him now for theirs if he would. He was sufficiently educated to
know that it was more glorious to die, even unrenowned, upon such a
mission, than to live in the prosperity that belongs to ordinary
covetousness, that should it be his duty to obey this call, no other
duty remained for him in its neglect.
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