This act, he said, made
him imagine that he was obtaining coitus. He advised me to slide
my penis back and forth in the vagina whenever I should actually
obtain coitus. In my room at school J. once drew an imaginary map
of a bagnio, in which the water-closet was carefully displayed
_en suite_ with the bedrooms. J. and I never masturbated
together. Indeed, I cannot remember seeing his organ. A hulking
boy of 16, who lived opposite the school-grounds, became intimate
with J., and we three went on a walk up the railroad track. The
big boy, W., tried to inflame my passions by telling me how he
and J. had had coitus with a handsome black-haired widow in town,
but I remained cold.
During this year I fell in love with C., a popular, talkative,
witty boy of my own age, or perhaps a year younger. He fancied me
and we slept together one night under the most innocent
circumstances. I never dreamed of having sexual relations with
him, and yet I fairly burned with love for him. My stay at his
beautiful home over Sunday while his parents were away was one
long delight. We slept in each other's arms, but there was no
sexuality. En route to C.
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