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Kipling, Rudyard, 1865-1936

"The Man Who Would Be King"

???
They certainly were too big for the office.
Dravot??™s beard seemed to fill half the room
and Carnehan??™s shoulders the other half, as
they sat on the big table. Carnehan continued:
??”???The country isn??™t half worked
out because they that governs it won??™t let
you touch it. They spend all their blessed
time in governing it, and you can??™t lift a
spade, nor chip a rock, nor look for oil, nor
anything like that without all the Government
saying??”???Leave it alone and let us
govern.??™ Therefore, such as it is, we will let
it alone, and go away to some other place
where a man isn??™t crowded and can come to
his own. We are not little men, and there
is nothing that we are afraid of except Drink,
and we have signed a Contrack on that.
Therefore, we are going away to be Kings.???
???Kings in our own right,??? muttered
Dravot.
???Yes, of course,??? I said. ???You??™ve been
tramping in the sun, and it??™s a very warm
night, and hadn??™t you better sleep over the
notion? Come to-morrow.???
???Neither drunk nor sunstruck,??? said
Dravot. ???We have slept over the notion
half a year, and require to see Books and
Atlases, and we have decided that there is
only one place now in the world that two
strong men can Sar-a-whack. They call it
Kafiristan. By my reckoning its the top
right-hand corner of Afghanistan, not more
than three hundred miles from Peshawar.
They have two and thirty heathen idols there,
and we??™ll be the thirty-third.


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