They almost always found the body. During the bathing
season there are plenty of bodies. I have been cremated again and again.
At first I used to attend my own funeral in disguise, because I had read
about a man doing that in an old romance by an author named Bennett,
from whom I remember borrowing five pounds in 1912. But I got tired of
that. I would not cross the street now to read my latest epitaph.
_The Chief Secretary and the President look very glum. Their incredulity
is vanquished at last._
BURGE-LUBIN. Look here. Do you chaps realize how awful this is? Here we
are sitting calmly in the presence of a man whose death is overdue by
two centuries. He may crumble into dust before our eyes at any moment.
BARNABAS. Not he. He'll go on drawing his pension until the end of the
world.
THE ARCHBISHOP. Not quite that. My expectation of life is only three
hundred years.
BARNABAS. You will last out my time anyhow: that's enough for me.
THE ARCHBISHOP [_coolly_] How do you know?
BARNABAS [_taken aback_] How do I know!
THE ARCHBISHOP. Yes: how do you know? I did not begin even to suspect
until I was nearly seventy.
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