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Shaw, George Bernard, 1856-1950

"Back to Methuselah"

What was I to do? Bleach
my hair? Hobble about on two sticks? Mimic the voice of a centenarian?
Better have killed myself.
BARNABAS. You ought to have killed yourself. As an honest man you were
entitled to no more than an honest man's expectation of life.
THE ARCHBISHOP. I did kill myself. It was quite easy. I left a suit of
clothes by the seashore during the bathing season, with documents in the
pockets to identify me. I then turned up in a strange place, pretending
that I had lost my memory, and did not know my name or my age or
anything about myself. Under treatment I recovered my health, but not my
memory. I have had several careers since I began this routine of life
and death. I have been an archbishop three times. When I persuaded
the authorities to knock down all our towns and rebuild them from the
foundations, or move them, I went into the artillery, and became a
general. I have been President.
BURGE-LUBIN. Dickenson?
THE ARCHBISHOP. Yes.
BURGE-LUBIN. But they found Dickenson's body: its ashes are buried in St
Paul's.
THE ARCHBISHOP.


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