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Shaw, George Bernard, 1856-1950

"Back to Methuselah"

Have you heard the result of the bye-election?
CONFUCIUS. A walk-over. Only one candidate.
BURGE-LUBIN. Any good?
CONFUCIUS. He was released from the County Lunatic Asylum a fortnight
ago. Not mad enough for the lethal chamber: not sane enough for any
place but the division lobby. A very popular speaker.
BURGE-LUBIN. I wish the people would take a serious interest in
politics.
CONFUCIUS. I do not agree. The Englishman is not fitted by nature to
understand politics. Ever since the public services have been manned by
Chinese, the country has been well and honestly governed. What more is
needed?
BURGE-LUBIN. What I cant make out is that China is one of the worst
governed countries on earth.
CONFUCIUS. No. It was badly governed twenty years ago; but since we
forbade any Chinaman to take part in our public services, and imported
natives of Scotland for that purpose, we have done well. Your
information here is always twenty years out of date.
BURGE-LUBIN. People don't seem to be able to govern themselves. I cant
understand it. Why should it be so?
CONFUCIUS.


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